- "Martha, get me the shotgun!"
- ―Harold Turnipseed[src]
After he noticed that Cryptosporidium killed his cows with Psychokenisis, Harold tried to kill Crypto with a shotgun, but was electrocuted to death with the Zap-O-Matic. The local paper posthumously charged him with "cow abuse".
- Harold was voiced by Andre Sogliuzzo.
- Harold looked and sounded identical to the other farm hands that were encountered at Turnipseed Farm and Rockwell.