- "I've got it! The solution to Fermat's Last Theorem! It's...oh wait, wait...ah, crap, I just had it!"
- ―A German scientist
Scientists are intelligent humans given the title, in Destroy All Humans! and Destroy All Humans! 2. There are three types of scientists, German scientists (more common), American scientists (less common), and Russian scientists (only found in Tunguska).
The most common form of scientist found in Destroy All Humans!. Believing themselves to be far superior to Americans, most of their thoughts are them insulting either American scientists or thinking about something "nerdy", for lack of a better term. They wear white lab coats. They can most commonly be found on the Majestic base in Area 42 or at the Octagon in Capitol City, but are also seen during one mission in Santa Modesta, where they are wearing brown coats.
American scientists are the less common form of scientist found in Destroy All Humans!, also known as Suburban Crazies. They are mostly present around Santa Modesta. They are seen wearing tin-foil hats and will run when they see Crypto, despite their thoughts saying that they want to see an alien. American scientists are portrayed as being "extra-terrestrial crackpots". There is one American scientist who helps Crypto find Bert Whither in the mission Foreign Correspondent. There are also American scientists that look like German scientists wearing brown coats (except in This Island Suburbia, where the German scientists wear brown coats). The "sane" American scientists can be found in Futon Down.
This form of scientist is explicit to Destroy All Humans! 2 and are only found in Tunguska, Russia. Unlike any other scientist found in the Destroy All Humans! series, this scientist division consists of men and women. Russian scientists are most commonly found in Science Town, working at the nuclear power plant, but can also be found around the frozen lake.